My Dad passed away on Friday.

He was funny, proud, an avid outdoorsman with a passion for his Italian heritage and all of the delicious food that accompanied that. Dad’s handwritten recipe card for one of his favorite things to cook read “Pizza Doe,” which sort of said it all about the things most often on his mind.

He was also an alcoholic. An outgoing, jokey person everyone in his wider circle loved to be around, but who could be very difficult to love up close.

For years, I told myself I was just protecting my peace by keeping my distance. And maybe I was. But I was also being hard. I’ve been thinking about how easy it is to be unbending when someone’s brokenness hurts you, and how much harder it can be to give grace.

Loss, especially a sudden loss like this one, changes your vision. Suddenly, all the sharp edges you thought were necessary boundaries look more like unfortunate brick walls.

It’s a lesson that applies to life and leadership. We could all stand to give more grace. Because we’re all doing the best we can.

Here’s to you, Dad. I can’t get time back, but I can remember you at your best, and share those stories. Wherever you are, I hope you’re enjoying all the most delicious homemade pizza, and maybe even bagging a “good-looking” doe.